Too Soon Old, Too Late Smart: Thirty Thirty True Things You Need to Know Now - Gordon Livingston, M.D.
Livingston's book is chock full of practical wisdom and profound truth. Many of his aphorisms touch home without additional commentary: "It is difficult to remove by logic an idea not placed there by logic in the first place", "Any relationship is under the control of the person who cares the least" (because they have less to lose), "The perfect is the enemy of the good," "Our greatest strengths are our greatest weaknesses," "Not all who wander are lost," and "Only bad things happen quickly" are just a few. Livingston lost two grown adult children within the space of 13 months - one to leukemia, the other to suicide. This gives many of his reflections particularly weight and poignancy. His thoughts on happiness, expectations, death, and old age are powerful. I particular liked his comments on perfectionism: "In defense of perfectionism, it might be said that obsessive people make the world function for the rest of us. Who, after all, wants to be operated on by a relaxed surgeon, or on an airplane maintained by mechanics satisfied when their work is “good enough”? If we excel at anything, it is because we are prepared to sweat the details… The problem with perfectionists and their preoccupation with control is that the qualities that make them effective in their work can render them insufferable in their personal lives… in some settings, notably in our intimate relationships, we gain control only by relinquishing it" (43-44). This is a small book with big wisdom!