The Darwin Awards: Intelligent Design - Wendy Northcutt with Christopher M. Kelly
The Darwin Awards celebrate those who give their all for the good of humankind by removing themselves from the gene pool. Recipients do this in one of two ways: (1) through death in an extraordinarily idiotic manner, or (2) by losing their ability to reproduce (again, in an extraordinarily idiotic manner). The Darwin Awards recognize the "single-minded purpose and self-sacrifice of each winner, and the spectacular means by which he snuffs himself" (3-4). Candidates are evaluated using the following five criteria: (1) Reproductive Dead End: The candidate must remove himself from the gene pool; (2) Excellence: The candidate must exhibit an astounding misapplication of judgment; (3) Self-selection: The candidate must be the cause of his own demise; (4) Maturity: The candidate must be capable of sound judgment; and (4) Veracity: The event must be verified. This book is a collection of Darwin Award winners and Honorable Mentions (candidates who "stop short of the ultimate sacrifice, but still illustrate the innovative spirit of Darwin Award candiates"). At times, this book is painful to read. At times, it is absolutely hilarious. Stories include a man who drowns in his own kitchen sink, a man who placed an eel up his rectum in order to relieve constipation, a man who confused his own penis for a chicken's neck and proceeded to chop it off, and other grisly, strange tales of idiocy. Perhaps the most painful part about reading this book is when one identifies too closely with the lunacy. I have my own share of stupid things I've done, and yet - thank God! - I've still not earned a Darwin Award! By the way, if you want a taste without buying the book, check out The Darwin Awards Website.